Committed

As part of my conditioning, I’m required to sleep on the floor again tonight. Ms Cassandra has ordered that I do so while chained in a position that forces me to crawl. I won’t be able to stand upright. I’ll also be locked into a deprivation hood that will completely blackout my vision for the entire night.

Why am I doing this? I don’t know. I’m not a bondage fetishist. I’m not a captivity freak. I’m just a lost bottom looking to experience authentic loss of power. Ms Cassandra has committed to taking me on that journey. And reciprocating that effort is what’s keeping me honest right now.

I’m about to endure several hours of frustrating torment that does absolutely nothing for my dick. But it will endear me to Ms Cassandra. I think she will enjoy knowing that she has a slave conditioned to sleep on the floor next to her bed, without making a fuss and disturbing her sleep.

I also know that heavier play is coming. And I will be pushed to the point where I will want out. But I won’t have the control. I’ll have to trust Ms Cassandra to decide when I am allowed out. But during that time, I will need to be prepared physically and mentally to endure extended periods of discomfort. Otherwise I will break, and bailout.

And this won’t be fun for anyone if I bail out.

Fuck….I can’t believe it. I’m a grown man. I’ve got my shit together. Women are interested in me. I could have a life. Instead there is only one woman who understands that I feel affection through oppression. And I must serve her, because there really is no one else who can push these buttons. Therefore, I can’t weasel my way out of this. I’m going to do it.